Monday, February 15, 2016

His name...

It's been almost a year since I wrote on my blog. Partly because I’ve been out of touch with my creative side, the other reason it’s because I’ve been too busy dating. 

His name is Joel.


We met through friends in a bar with a big stuffed moose inside of it. Little did I know Joel would change my world is such a great way. We have been together for nine months today! These past nine months have been full of adventures, new lessons, wet kisses, sleepless nights, laughter and new experiences. I can’t say they’ve been perfect; honestly no relationship is perfect nor would I want it to be. There’s always more to learn, more to discover from bumps in the relationship and it only makes it stronger. 




 The hardest part was to let my guard down, to let someone in, to become emotionally and psychologically intimate. So far, it’s totally worth it! All the heartaches, all the tears and all the breakups I’ve been through are finally worth it. And I am thankful they all ended and are now in the past.


  Joel makes it easy to want to fight through the ups and downs. We both have our own struggles, wishes and goals. At times we might even be on opposite stands, but we find our middle ground. We find that common ground that supports and roots our relationship. And for this, I am very thankful. Thanks to him, I write again. Thanks to Joel I find myself writing again. This post is dedicated to him, to our journey together. I leave with photo memories etched on my mind.














Thank you Joel. J

Saturday, July 18, 2015

I am a DREAMer

On April 7th, Augsburg College made the announcement to “expand its commitment to educating students of ability” regardless of their immigration status. This was in support of United We Dream’s National Institution Coming Out Day, the largest immigrant youth-led organization in the nation. One of the commitments Augsburg has pledged to do is to “empower undocumented students to come out of the shadows” and continue their education and obtain a degree. The phrase “to come out of the shadows” lingers on my mind because for the first time I am neither afraid nor ashamed to come out of the shadows and talk about my own journey through this academic world as an undocumented student.

I often think the greatest challenge I have faced has been obtaining a degree in a private college as an undocumented student. But as I consider the phrase “to come out of the shadows” I realize that my biggest obstacle has not been the inability to afford college, but rather admitting my own immigration status for fear of judgment and the stigma associated with being undocumented and living in the shadows. As an undocumented student, college was not an option for me in high school. My school counselor made it clear when I sought her advice and she confronted me with a truth I had not considered, I was an “illegal immigrant” with no means of going to college. Without any guidance or financial support, I worked two jobs to pay tuition while attending a community college. I started as a part time student, but after the first semester I was exhausted and gave up.

Two years later, my younger sister started attending college and I decided to follow her footsteps. I attended a community college for far longer than any other students have, still working full time to pay for tuition. No one in college had ever offered support or talked to me about financial options. In colleges, it had been established that undocumented students do not qualify for financial aid, or any other government funded aid (scholarships included), so the best the schools could do was to set up payment plans.

On June 15th, 2012 President Obama created a policy, in response to the DREAM Act advocacy, calling for deferred action for certain undocumented young people who came to the United States as children. On August 15, 2012 Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals (DACA) was implemented. Under the stipulations of the new policy, many young people like me could now obtain a work permit, but this did not mean that we were granted legal status. In fact, it is simply a temporary measure and solution that does not grant any benefits legal residents and citizens have. One of the most important for young people is access to financial assistance or government funded scholarships.

In the summer of 2013, I mustered enough courage to apply to a day program in a four-year college or university. I started visiting some of them; certain universities treated me differently after learning about my legal status and one private school even suggested I don’t waste my time in touring the campus since I could not afford it. By Fall, I had lost hope and my dream of experiencing college life seemed more distant than ever. It was then that someone recommended I look into Augsburg College, I hesitated, but I applied anyway. This has been one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. Within weeks, I was contacted by someone in admissions and I was guided through the final application process. I was also awarded a scholarship that paid about a third of my tuition; this was a huge, but welcomed surprise. I was offered a tour, but before I could schedule one I was already meeting the faculty of the social work program.  In the fall of 2013 I started attending Augsburg College with the intent to obtain a Bachelor's Degree in Social Work. That same year, a very kind lady suggested that I apply for the Minnesota Dream Act to help pay my tuition; she explained that Minnesota passed The Prosperity Act, better known as The Minnesota Dream Act, that summer. Under this state policy, undocumented students meeting certain criteria could apply for state financial aid. Because I worked full time and I had already completed a big portion of my credits, I was awarded little financial aid, but still helped a lot.

After two years of juggling an internship, a full time job, school and homework, this May I graduate with a Bachelors Degree in Social Work. Stepping out of the shadow has not been easy; putting myself through school hasn’t been easy either.  But it is proof that Latino students are committed and determined to obtain an education. My story is not unique, there are several other students like myself who have achieved and accomplished their academic goals. For those living in the shadows for fear or shame, it is time we stand up and accomplish our dreams. And just like Augsburg College is supporting these students, I hope other colleges and universities unite and together support our community.

My wonderful parents. Photo taken by Martin Rosales

My cousin Lundy and my younger sister Nena. Photo taken by Martin Rosales

Saturday, November 15, 2014

Conrad

Ben Howard has a new album out and it's fucking amazing!!

My favorites fluctuate between Conrad to Time Is Dancing... I can't decide which one is my favorite yet. But they have been on replay in my car. I love the feeling of this new album. It's like a mixture of your favorite seasons with your favorite memories and that anticipation of something beautiful. Conrad is a pleasant and melodious song, soothing and intriguing.

Happy listening!

Wednesday, September 17, 2014

Promise Me

"Who am I, darling for you?" 

... How I miss the touch of his fingers on my skin, and the smell of his lips on my tongue. He's across the country while I'm stuck in a state of mind so hard to break through... 

Monday, June 9, 2014

Lately...


So much has happened in the last few weeks.

So many good things have been happening lately, but along with those good things came the changes one must accommodate. But, that's actually beside the point, it's the extra things that life has thrown my way that I'm most grateful for... 

A few weeks ago, I met the cousin of a friend. He is a Korean exchange student at Oklahoma University. At first, I didn't think too much about him, but as we got to know each other we discovered we had much in common. We both love soccer, and there wasn't a day that we didn't mention something about our favorite teams or players. We bonded over music and we toured the beautiful Minnesota. 

We said goodbye last Thursday. And I can feel the void in my afternoons without him. I don't know when I will see him again, or if I ever will. But I know one thing of sure... the fact that I feel the void of his absence means that he left a mark in my life. I can say he feels the same way too. His kindness and purity in his actions were unique and altruistic. He had no other intentions but friendship, and I knew it, which is why I miss him. 

I know if I ever visit South Korea, I can count on him to tour South Korea with me! I can't wait for that opportunity. 

And as usual, here are some pictures of him--














Sunday, May 11, 2014

My cat and I

Today I spent the day with Talitha. 

We slept in, read, and relaxed.

We also took a few selfies! 





Wednesday, April 2, 2014

To Grow Up or Not To Grow Up, That Is The Question

This afternoon at work, my friend and I suddenly had the urge to listen to Ed Sheeran. Do you know how amazing he sounds? I am head over heels for this guy! :P



We literally played this song over and over again!


Sometimes, I know I say ridiculous stuff, but today we were completely off the wall!
Among other things said (and sounds we made), we finally found the word to describe this song: eargasmic! We laughed so hard someone had to tell us to quiet down.

I asked her if we were ever going to grow up. As if this was a choice. We looked at each other and started laughing again and said: "Nope! We're never going to grow up!".


It is comforting to know that a certain part of me will always remain playful and child-like. Life shouldn't be so serious. There's always room for humor.

Then I met a guy at my favorite coffee shop (there weren't any tables left so he sat down at my table across from me) and I caught myself talking very mature and "grown". I sounded so different, so sure of myself. I know the environment changed, and the setting was different, but deep down inside I felt more like myself when I was laughing my ass off with my friend.

So, maybe I don't want to grow up. And the cool thing about this is that my friends don't care how silly, goofy, or immature I am. There are boundaries and limits to immaturity, but honestly, why rush it!

So, be goofy, be silly, and be yourself. One day we will have to grow up... but not today! (This is the creative procrastinator in me!)

:)

P.S. Meet my friend: